Of Family Time, Internship, and Decisions...

Dear Golden Boy,

Congrats, again! All I ever seem to be saying to you is congrats, because you’re always doing something amazing.

Before anything else, we missed you today. As per tradition, Chacha and Chachi took us to Saturday Club where we all went for a swim, had lunch, and raided the club shop. Since your presence was missed, we made do by bringing up all your embarrassing Saturday Club experiences, and laughing at your expense.

Your sisters keep asking me whether or not they’re going to see you this year, and if so, when. They’re like broken records about it. I’ll be meeting you in exactly a month from now, and I know that these 30 or so days are going to pass by in a flash because my internship, family, and friends are going to keep me busy.

Speaking of my internship, I’m working under a clinical psychologist, and I really enjoy it. I not only get to sit in and observe the sessions with the clients, I’ve also learnt to administer a number of IQ and behavioural tests such as the WISC, MISIC, Conner’s, and the like. I’ve also been taking the client’s case history, and due to this I’ve come into contact with people suffering from various disorders ranging from mental retardation and dyslexia, to severe ADHD and OCD. This practical exposure is an amazing experience for me, because I’m learning so much. It is also helping me equip myself to deal with and understand certain situations I may face later. For example, some of the sessions are very emotionally draining, and due to the ethics of counselling, it’s not as if you can take your client’s problems back home and unwind or vent it all out to someone. We had been told earlier during our course that it will be tough, but now I actually understand how tough it can be. To sit all day and listen to the troubles people go through, to ensure that you do not get emotionally attached to a client, to form solutions and be confident that you can help the client face his/her problems, to be a vault for all your client’s issues...it’s not an easy task.

Even so, doing this internship has given me the confidence that this field is right up my alley. It is something I know I will excel at, something that comes naturally to me. However, I’ve been thinking of the future a lot. I love planning, and I’ve always had a set plan about what I want to do after college, but not anymore. For the first time, I am confused. Should I walk down the well planned, concrete path, or venture into one more unsteady and challenging?

My confusion reminds me of one of Robert Frost’s most famous poems, ‘The Road Not Taken’. He ends the poem with the line, “I took the road less travelled by, and that has made all the difference.” I’ve always thought that this poem, and especially the closing line, is inspiring, and urges you to stand apart, follow your dreams, and experience life on your own terms.

So, what I’ve thought is, since I love reading poetry, I am going to end my posts by sharing with you a poem that I’ve read, and that I love. While talking about the future, and following dreams, I was reminded of a poem by Yeats named, ‘He Wishes for the Cloths of Heaven’. It is a short, but beautiful piece that can be interpreted in a number of ways. The amount of emotion this work of art can evoke in the reader is simply remarkable.

He Wishes for the Cloths of Heaven

Had I the heaven’s embroidered cloths,

Enwrought with golden and silver light,

The blue and the dim and the dark cloths

Of night and light and the half-light,

I would spread the cloths under your feet:
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;

I have spread my dreams under your feet;

Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.

Until next week, Dods!

Love, Zee.

P.S. Happy Bengali New Year!